home search help contact





What are a Southerner's Five Favorite Things about Summer?

By Southern Humorists



Summer nights drinking beer on the front porch
Summer nights on the river, cat fishing, drinking beer
Summer afternoons after working all day, drinking beer
Summer days sitting in the A/C drinking beer
Summer = excuse to drink more beer. One must stay hydrated.


Has to be the biting chiggers,
sucking mosquitoes,
the evil weevil,
burning fire ants and
crawling road kill in a cornmeal batter.


Cold beer
Beer so cold ice forms in it after you take it from the fridge
Gnats keep the Yankees away







Slurping watermelon with the kids
Homemade ice cream on the back porch
No early bedtimes
Hot steaks and cold beer
Sitting on the bench swing watching the kids chase fireflies


Consoling the nervous dog while we watch the kids set off fireworks in the night sky.

Sweat dripping from my brow from working in the garden which will be replaced by the cool condensation that has formed on my mason jar full of sweet iced tea.

The smell of a water hose and fresh cut grass, fresh tomatoes, watermelon and charcoal grills.

The summer road trip vacation north to my sister's and my oldest son's. Roadside picnics, feet dangling into cold creeks for refreshment.

A hot, dark night and a tall, cold beer--me in my white rocker, looking at the stars



Swimming in your own sweat
Any activity that includes copious quantities of beer
Late night catfishing with Billie Jo Hooha
That first summer with indoor central AC
The sheer delight of sitting on the porch on a calm,
star-filled night, using fireflies or locusts to hone your
by-site-and-sound shotgun snap shooting skills.



Chicken Fried Steak

Not necessarily in that order. ;-]


Air Conditioning - very popular in the south
Blooming flowers, azalea, magnolia, dogwood and such
Fruit slushes from Sonic
Fresh produce and cooking out


Trying to walk slow enough so as not to break a sweat.
With how bout them Braves and how bout that heat, never any lack of conversation.
Half as many clothes, half as much laundry.
With half as many clothes, never a lack of conversation,
especially at the beach.
Rabbits in the basement.

Copyright Southern Humorists
All rights belong to individual authors


Southern Humorists

- Chicken & Road 
- Writing Contest
- Naming a Hamster
- Bad Love Poems
- Boiled Peanuts
- Tipsy Chicken
- Marriage Advice
- Snake Handlin'
- Rhubarb
- Bacon Grease
- Ressel Pees
- Sassafras
- Fried Jelly Beans
- Sneaky Snake
- Snipe Huntin'
- Super Dudes
- Big Butts
- Redneck Car
- Purty Peggy
- Summer Thangs
- Tub O' Lard
- W'men or Girls
- Exclamation Mark
- Cut the Mustard
- Rooster Contest


Southern Humorists 
Humor Writers
  Humor Columnists
  Funny Bloggers 
Comedy Writers
 Online Support & 
Journalist Trade 
Discussion Group
Est. 2003

     Southern Humorists Trucker Hat
SoHum Merchandise

Redneck American Gothic

Dixie Dispatch

   Featured Writer at Southern Humorists

Grab a Button!.

Members' Websites
& Blogs

Frequently Asked



Promote Your Page Too


Home  Team  Shop  Join   Dixie Dispatch   Banners  Contact Us

"We Cover the Country Like Kudzu"

Copyright 2013 Southern Humorists' Enterprises
Editor - Angela Gillaspie | Editor - Sheila Moss | Consulting Editor - Ben Baker | Moderator Mark Berryman
Dixie Dispatch by Angela Gillaspie | by Sheila Moss | Publicity Editor - Leeuna Foster