Dear Person-Who-Made-Me-Sick,

I wanted to send you a letter to let you know how much I appreciate your visiting me in my home last week. It was such a nice surprise. Thank you for singling me out as one of your special friends, and for taking the time away from your sick bed to come and visit me. You were barely able to hold up your head and yet you came.

I truly enjoyed talking with you and hearing all about your illness and suffering. The sneezing and coughing was adorable and you really looked great with a 102 degree temperature. Fever really does become you. It brings out your eyes, and the rash added a kind of pinkish glow to your skin.

The parting gifts you left were very much appreciated. After all, who wouldn't be delighted to wake up with a hacking cough, a runny nose and a sore throat. Oh, and this raging fever is just what I have been needing. Everyone dreams, at least once in their life time, of waking up with a headache that is so severe it feels like they've parted their hair with a hatchet.

Seriously, thank you. This is the perfect gift for someone who basically has no immune system. Also, my diabetes and anemia make it even more special to me than to most of your other friends, who are, to coin a phrase, "healthy as horses".

Your timing was perfect too, as this is the busiest time of the year at the newspaper office. They love it when we can't do our jobs. Who knows, they may give me a bonus this year in the form of a pink slip or perhaps severance pay.

Since we haven't seen one another in several years, I'm quite certain it would have killed the both of us if you had waited another week — say until you were less contagious — before you came for a visit. I'm just happy that you seized the moment and dropped by. It isn't everyday that visitors catch me on my way out the door. Your timing was amazing.

I am looking forward to sharing the gifts you left for me with my hubby. It isn't like he has a great health plan or anything. Actually he has no health plan so his doctor's visit and medication will be a real boost to our nearly nonexistent bank account. Not to mention the days or possibly weeks he will get to spend away from his work.

In my fever-induced delirium I almost forgot to tell you that my two "wasbands" would probably love to see you too. Perhaps you could drop by and visit with them before your germs have all become dormant. They too enjoy a good bout of the flu and strep throat each year. After all, what are ex-wives for if not to share?

Anyway, have a very happy flu season and a great viral new year. I hope you can come for a visit again soon. Or perhaps you might want to wait until early spring. I hear that spring time is a good time for chicken pox. Maybe you can bring me a case of them. I've never had chicken pox before and I hear they're loads of fun.

If I happen to get a twenty-four-hour virus within the coming months I'll be sure to drop by and visit with you. I won't call ahead, I'll just drop in and surprise you.

However, if this affliction happens to kill me I'll be dropping by to visit you on a nightly basis. When I'm not knocking things off your shelves or slamming doors, I'll be in your attic dragging chains across the floor.

Copyright Leeuna Foster

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Leeuna Foster is a Marketing Strategist, Author and Poet. Although she enjoys writing in all genres, her favorite is children's short stories.

Leeuna is a columnist for hometown paper, The Beacon. Her work has also appeared in ByLine Magazine, Modern Romances, Happiness Magazine, Grit, The Advocate, The Erwin Record and Johnson City Press Chronicle. Her books are available in print as well as in ebook form. Her poetry and children's fiction have won several national and regional awards.

She is also a syndicated author at www.ideamarketers.com , and has achieved Expert Author status at www.ezinearticles.com .